Quran
Hadith
Islamic Text
Crying when a person dies is permitted. However, wailing is prohibited. But wailing does not cause the dead pain or punishment unless the dead requested it or encouraged it. This is the opinion of the Hanafi Madhab.
فَقَالَ: أَلاَ تَسْمَعُونَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ لاَ يُعَذِّبُ بِدَمْعِ العَيْنِ، وَلاَ بِحُزْنِ القَلْبِ، وَلَكِنْ يُعَذِّبُ بِهَذَا – وَأَشَارَ إِلَى لِسَانِهِ – أَوْ يَرْحَمُ، وَإِنَّ المَيِّتَ يُعَذَّبُ بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ عَلَيْهِ
The Prophet ﷺ said, ‘Will you not listen? Indeed Allah (Most High) does not punish for shedding tears, nor for the grief of the heart. Rather He punishes or bestows mercy due to this, and he ﷺ pointed to his tongue. Indeed the deceased is punished for the wailing of his relatives over him.’ (Sahih al-Bukhari, 1304)
The Hadith above makes it clear that mere tears are not prohibited (Haram), nor is feeling grief at the passing of a loved one. Rather wailing is prohibited. Which is to shout things or make noise whilst weeping (see link below for more details).
وأما ما ورد أن الميت ليعذب ببكاء أهله عليه فأجمعوا على أنه محمول على البكاء بصوت ونياحة ولا بمجرد الدمع وحمله عامة أهل العلم على ما إذا أوصى بذلك وأما من بكوا عليه وناحوا من غير وصية فلا لقوله تعالى {ولا تزر وازرة وزر أخرى} (الأنعام) وهذا هو الصحيح من أوجه الحمل. (حاشية على مراقي الفلاح شرح نور الإيضاح)
As for that which was mentioned in the Hadith, ‘Indeed the deceased is punished for the wailing of his relatives over him.’ They agreed that this refers to crying accompanied by speech and wailing, not tears alone. Also, the majority of scholars understood it to refer to someone who requested it. As for someone they cry and wail over without him requesting it, then no (he is not sinful). Due to his words (Most High), No soul that is burdened (with sin) shall bear the burden (sin) of another. (Surah al-Anaam 164). And this is the sound interpretation. (Imam Ahmad bin Muhammad al-Tahtawi, Haashiyah Ala Maraaqi al-Falah).
Although wailing is prohibited, does it cause punishment for the deceased? The Hadith above and the narration below, both seem to affirm that it does.
عَنِ ابْنِ عُمَرَ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُمَا، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ: المَيِّتُ يُعَذَّبُ فِي قَبْرِهِ بِمَا نِيحَ عَلَيْهِ
Ibn Umar narrated from his father (May Allah Most High be pleased with them both) that the Prophet ﷺ said, ‘The deceased is punished in his grave due to people wailing over him.’ (Sahih al-Bukhari, 1292).
These Hadith narrations must not be taken in isolation. It is prohibited to isolate verses of the Holy Quran or Hadith of the Prophet ﷺ, rather they must be understood in the broader context of Quran and Hadith. Many Hanafi scholars moved away from the literal meaning of the above Hadith narrations due to other evidence that clarified that a person is not punished for the misdeeds of others.
إنَّمَا يُعَذَّبُ الْمَيِّتُ بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ إذَا أَوْصَى بِذَلِكَ
(قَوْلُهُ إنَّمَا يُعَذَّبُ إلَخْ) قَالَ بَعْضُهُمْ: يُعَذَّبُ لِمَا فِي الْحَدِيثِ «إنَّ الْمَيِّتَ لَيُعَذَّبُ بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ عَلَيْهِ» وَقَالَ عَامَّةُ الْعُلَمَاءِ: لَا {وَلا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌ وِزْرَ أُخْرَى} [الأنعام: 164] وَتَأْوِيلُ الْحَدِيثِ أَنَّهُمْ فِي ذَلِكَ الزَّمَانِ كَانُوا يُوصُونَ بِالنُّوحِ، فَقَالَ – عَلَيْهِ الصَّلَاةُ وَالسَّلَامُ – ذَلِكَ بَحْرٌ عَنْ الظَّهِيرِيَّةِ. (رد المحتار على الدر المختار)
Imam al-Haskafi: The dead is only punished due to the wailing of his family if he encouraged it.
Imam Ibn Abideen: His saying, he is only punished. Some of them said this is due to the Hadith, ‘Indeed the deceased is punished for the wailing of his relatives over him.’ The majority of scholars said, this is not the case, rather, No soul that is burdened (with sin) shall bear the burden (sin) of another. (Surah al-Anaam 164). Therefore, the Hadith is interpreted, since in that time they used to request wailing (after their death). So, he ﷺ said that. As mentioned in al-Bahr narrating from al-Dhaheeriyah. (Radd al-Muhtaar).
وَفِي الظَّهِيرِيَّةِ وَهَلْ يُعَذَّبُ الْمَيِّتُ بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ عَلَيْهِ فَقَالَ بَعْضُهُمْ يُعَذَّبُ لِقَوْلِهِ – عَلَيْهِ الصَّلَاةُ وَالسَّلَامُ – «إنَّ الْمَيِّتَ لَيُعَذَّبُ بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ» وَقَالَ عَامَّةُ الْعُلَمَاءِ لَا يُعَذَّبُ لِقَوْلِهِ تَعَالَى {وَلا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌ وِزْرَ أُخْرَى} [الأنعام: 164] وَتَأْوِيلُ الْحَدِيث أَنَّهُمْ فِي ذَلِكَ الزَّمَانِ كَانُوا يُوصُونَ بِالنَّوْحِ عَلَيْهِمْ فَقَالَ – عَلَيْهِ الصَّلَاةُ وَالسَّلَامُ – ذَلِكَ اهـ. (البحر الرائق شرح كنز الدقائق)
And in al-Dhaheeriyah: Is the dead punished due to the wailing of his relatives over him? Some of them said he is punished due to his ﷺ saying, ‘Indeed the deceased is punished for the wailing of his relatives.’ However, the majority of scholars said, he is not punished, due to his words (Most High), No soul that is burdened (with sin) shall bear the burden (sin) of another. (Surah al-Anaam 164). Therefore, the Hadith is interpreted, since in that time they used to request wailing to be carried out upon them (after their death). So, he ﷺ said that. (Imam Zayn al-Deen ibn Nujaym, al-Bahr al-Raiq).
وَالْحَاصِلُ أَنَّ الْمَيِّتَ إِذَا كَانَ لَهُ تَسَبُّبٌ فِي هَذِهِ الْمَعْصِيَةِ وَلَوْ بِتَقْصِيرٍ فِي الْوَصِيَّةِ، أَوْ رَضِيَ بِهَذِهِ الْقَضِيَّةِ، فَالْعَذَابُ عَلَى حَقِيقَتِهِ، وَإِلَّا فَمَحْمُولٌ عَلَى تَأَلُّمِهِ سَواءً عِنْدَ نَزْعِهِ أَوْ مَوْتِهِ، وَيَسْتَوِي فِيهِ الْكَافِرُ وَالْمُؤْمِنُ، وَبِهَذَا يَحْصُلُ الْجَمْعُ بَيْنَ قَوْلِهِ تَعَالَى: {وَلَا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌ وِزْرَ أُخْرَى} [الأنعام: 164] وَبَيْنَ الْأَحَادِيثِ الْمُطْلَقَةِ فِي هَذِهِ الْبَلِيَّةِ الْكُبْرَى. (مرقاة المفاتيح شرح مشكاة المصابيح)
In conclusion, if the deceased was a cause of this sin, even if it was due to failing (to prohibit it) in his Wasiyah (final advice), or he was pleased with it (wailing), then he will be punished. However, if that was not the case then the Hadith is understood to refer to pain he experiences during the process of death. That is the same for a Kafir and a believer. In this manner we can reconcile between His words (Most High): And no soul that is burdened (with sin) shall bear the burden (sin) of another. (Surah al-Anaam 164), and the Hadith narrations mentioning this great calamity. (Imam Ali al-Qari, Mirqaat al-Mafateeh).
As seen in the above texts (Nusoos), Hanafi scholars said a person will not be punished for the wailing of others if he had nothing to do with it. However, if he encouraged the wailing or even failed to prohibit it, if he was aware of it being a widespread practice, then he may be punished. As in this case the wailing is related to his action or inaction. In this way the verses in the Holy Quran and the Hadith narrations were reconciled by Hanafi Imams.
Not only is this the sound position in the Hanafi Madhab, but it is also the opinion of other great Imams of Ahl al-Sunnah, like Imam al-Bukhari. As mentioned by Imam al-Ayni in his commentary on Sahih al -Bukhari. Although he did recognise that there is a difference of opinion within Ahl al-Sunnah.
وَالْحَاصِل أَن الْعلمَاء ذكرُوا فِي قَوْله، صلى الله عَلَيْهِ وَسلم: (إِن الْمَيِّت يعذب ببكاء أَهله) ثَمَانِيَة أَقْوَال، أَصَحهَا وَهُوَ تَأْوِيل الْجُمْهُور على أَنه مَحْمُول على من أوصى بِهِ، وَإِلَيْهِ ذهب البُخَارِيّ. (عمدة القاري شرح صحيح البخاري).
In conclusion, regarding his ﷺ words, ‘Indeed the deceased is punished for the wailing of his relatives.’ The scholars mentioned eight opinions. The soundest of them is the interpretation of the majority, that it is understood to refer to someone who requested it (wailing). And this was the opinion of (Imam) al-Bukhari. (Imam Badr al-Deen al-Ayni, Umdatu al-Qari).
A person who engages in wailing when someone dies is certainly sinful, and liable to be punished. However, the person who passed away is not punished because this is not his action. In Islam a person is not held responsible for the misdeeds of others if he had no participation or influence in the sin.
And Allah Most High Knows Best.
-Answered by Shaykh Noorud-deen Rashid (19.07.2022)
See also:
Is it permitted to cry when a person dies?
What should you say when a person dies?
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